“I Am

“I Am” by Jeannine Etter

March 9, 2021

“I am” are two of the most powerful words in the English language. It is a statement of clarity and manifestation. A statement of existence… a declaration of being. It can also be an expression of resistance and liberation against any outside force trying to impose negative or limited definitions onto you such as “You are inferior. And therefore worthy of ill treatment.” And to that you can say, just as Muhammad Ali did, before he believed it himself, without arrogance or shame, “I am the greatest.”

“I am” is writing your name in graffiti on the wall of history. A tag. A signature that says, ”I was here.” When they ask “Well, who was she?” It is a statement of conviction and clarity as well as a protective anchor from outside forces that seek to enslave us with projections and definitions of who they think we are or should be that puts us in boxes. These boxes can also be described as psychological cages, prison cells or coffins.

The soul’s deep calling towards authenticity requires a statement of declaration that comes from the inside out. A statement you can hold onto like a mantra. A map. The North Star. Your guiding light as you travel through the inner night of the soul in search of your truth while being surrounded by the equivalent of slave catchers. These are the people who try to tell you who you are and exploit the fact that you don’t know. The people who give you an identity that fits into convenient alignment with their false identities of superiority.

And perhaps most notably, “I am that I am” is the name that God gave to Moses at the burning bush when asked for Its identity.

Here are definitions about me, pieces to my identity, for the world to remember.

I am a writer. I have been a writer since the age of 8 when the chaos of my household forced me to go inside and writing was the only safe place of escape. I wrote elaborate fictional stories of all the drama, passion, and pain I’d witnessed watching soap operas and reading children’s fairytales. I also wrote poetry. I was published in a children’s book around this time when a man came to our elementary school and gathered writings from the students. My first published poem was about skin color as my dark brown skin had caused me so much pain and confusion at that point, that it was the foremost issue on my mind. It’s very disconcerting to a human child to be called names based on how they look naturally. I would go on to overcome the low self-esteem this name-calling brought about, but that is another story for another time. I went on to write for my high school newspaper, edit the yearbook, for college newspapers, and have been published in several newsletters, newspapers, magazines, blogs, and books.

I am a poet resurrecting from years of walking with the spiritually dead. Reawakening and reimagining. Seeing the world as a magical, mystical place in which I am co-creator. Given the power of the word to bring shape and form to the void. Being made in the image and likeness of God.

I am an editor. After trying to leave an abusive situationiship, I lost my voice as a writer... an identity that had been central to my core since childhood. Within a whirlwind of confusion, God gave me the ability to help other writers with their voices editing and co-writing 7 books and counting, as well as newsletters, essays, church bulletins, and scripts.

I am an extroverted introvert. A full-fledged card-carrying member of Introverts Are Us United LLC. Introverted by nature. Extroverted by a force of nature larger than me that pushes me to be in front of the microphone when I’d much rather hide behind the scenes. Being introverted is not so much about what we do on the outside, but how we process the world inside.

In the interest of time and space, of which there is no time or space… here is a brief summary: I am a Virgo, an empath, an audio producer, an organizer, an event planner, a friend, a lover, a daughter, a cousin. I am good, truthful, and genuine, I am intelligent, loving and giving.

And yet all of these things as vast as they may seem do not define me. I am a multilayered. I am a work in progress. I am on a journey to explore the inner regions of my being in the eternal quest laid out by the Egyptians or people of ancient Khemet “Know Thyself.”

Of what I know now, I am a multidimensional, complex, ever growing, ever expanding, beautiful reflection of… the I am. And if I may be so bold as to ask “Who, my friend, are you?”

Writing

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